untreated group of aggressive boys. The boys in the program demonstrated higher self-esteem, better ability to solve problems, and fewer antisocial behaviors than the untreated aggressives. They were less likely to be using/ abusing drugs and more careful and less impulsive in their actions. They were also less angry. Tavris concludes her description of Lochman's program: "The better people are at controlling angry feelings, understanding where they come from and deciding what to do about them, the less angry they feel and the less need they have for anger."

One important point Dr. Tavris makes in her talk: research shows that "ventilating anger," either verbally or physically, is not helpful (this used to be the popular advice for dealing with anger). She calls this "practicing anger" and says that it only perpetuates the anger cycle.

Another book that I have used a bit in our house is Kids Can Cooperate: A Practical Guide to Teaching Problem Solving by Elizabeth Crary. This book involves parents as facilitators in problem-solving typical situations like children's squabbles. She also suggests ways for parents to discuss feelings with their children and ways to help them cope with anger.