News Release: On Mother’s Day: Saving Our Favorite Memories May 2002

For more information, contact: Susan DeRitis 703-866-4164 media@FamilyAndHome.org

Families observe Mother's Day in a wide variety of ways -- some with no fuss, others with more elaborate celebrations. Many of the gifts mothers receive will not come to them via the card store or the flower shop. In fact, our most favorite gifts don't usually arrive on schedule. These unexpected gifts, which we can keep only in our hearts, are often the ones that mean the most to us.

In celebration of Mother's Day, Family and Home Network shares some favorite moments from moms everywhere, and urges mothers to take a few moments to write down their own favorite memories:

On the way home from one of those last-minute, unwelcome errands, I reached to switch on the car radio and my six-year-old daughter piped up from the back seat, requesting a song from one of my favorite cassette tapes. I was surprised; I hadn't realized she had paid any attention to my music. By the time I found the song she wanted, we were almost home -- but I sailed past our house and kept driving as the song began. She knew all the words, and we sang along with Paul McCartney at the top of our lungs as we rolled through the night, happy with the song and with each other. -- Laura Jones

As I was coming down the steps I could see into the living room, where my almost three-year-old son hovered over my three-month-old son. I almost spoiled the moment, but caught myself -- taking a step back, I listened to what his gentle voice was saying. As the boys gazed into each other’s eyes, my toddler said," I love you with my heart and soul, little guy." I almost broke into tears. Those are the same words I say to him each morning while we cuddle and each night when we say our good nights. It made me feel wonderful to know that he does listen to my words of love, even though it often seems like he isn't listening to me.
-- Jody P. Perrin

When I saw that road, a freshly paved road heading away from the usual route, I just had to take it. I said, "Look, a new road." The response from the backseat, a resplendent "ADVENTURE!!!" from the two little ones I have come to know and love. We took it, my friend, we took it. The road eventually curved back to the main highway. There were no new sights to see, other than the backside of houses from the previous street. The simple act of adventure sparked our imaginations as we traveled the new road together. The conversation shared sent us on a much richer journey. Each of us had a wild idea about what might be around the next corner. It was a glorious day.
--Janet Breaux

When my son was four, I was busily trying to finish making a baby blanket, in preparation for the birth of our second baby. My son kept interrupting, and I tried as best as I could to fend off the frustration of not being able to get one simple sewing project done. How would I get ANYTHING done with two children, I wondered. It was pouring outside one afternoon, and my son was in his million-question mode, when he pulled a very large piece of batting from a bag. "What is this?" he asked. I almost hurriedly answered that it was batting, but turned off the sewing machine and picked up the bundle and said "Look! It's a cloud!" His eyes sparkled. We arranged our cloud and plopped right in the middle of it, my son and I, and time stopped. We were on our backs, looking up at the basement ceiling, 'floating' on our 'cloud', imagining the most wonderful adventures. This happened every day after that, for weeks and weeks. It was the best time. Then, when my daughter was born, and he asked me if she could please be on the cloud, too, he said "The whole world is perfect, on this cloud, with my Mom and my Aimee." …. He's fifteen now, my boy, and I've been working on a complicated quilt lately. I had almost forgotten all about our cloud and the magic it brought. He came to sit while my sewing machine hummed away and reached over to pick up a pile of batting. "Mom, remember?!" YES! I said, turning off the machine light. Tell me how you feel about that tuba audition tonight?"
-- Donna DeSoto

The other day my children were acting up as kids can do. I lectured them about how when people see them roughhousing or not listening it is a reflection on my mothering skills and in their eyes, I’m not doing a good job. Later my oldest son asked if other people should do what I've told my children to do and not judge a book by it's cover. He then told me that they don't know me if they think I'm not being a good mommy -- that I'm the best mommy in the whole world.
-- Allison Whittier

It was a few months after my first child, Ellie, was born. I had used up my maternity leave and vacation time, and was officially resigning my paid job. My coworkers took Ellie and me out to a very nice lunch. Afterwards, saying our goodbyes in the parking lot, I was holding Ellie up near my shoulder. It was a very gusty March day. The wind made Ellie take in sharp little gasps, and a look of sheer delight crossed her face each time. I will always remember that because it was when she crossed over from being a little lump of an infant into an obviously cognizant person; and it happened while she was held close in my arms.
-- Eileen Doughty

My six-year-old son came up to me "Let's dance, Mom! Please! I'll be right back!" He dashed out of the room, returning with his hair a bit wet and combed over to the side, a shy smile, and a black Batman cape flowing over his shoulders. He turned on some loud rock and roll and took my hand. We danced, twisted, turned and twirled. We giggled and laughed. When I needed a rest, he responded, "Mom, let me put something romantic on now." He found a slow song, bowed and took my hand as we began to slow dance. "Mom," he said as he looked up at me, "Can you get down on your knees and dance so we can look at each other's face while we dance?" I almost said no. Instead, captured by the moment, I complied, and my little man led me in a dance I will always remember. Looking into my eyes, he said, "You're my darling Mom. I'll always love you forever and ever...Mommy, we'll always be together. Even when one of us dies, we'll always be together in our hearts." As dusk quietly settled, we danced together, ever so slowly, cheek to cheek and heart to heart.
-- Marian Gormley

I had been having severe physical problems for quite some time and had just come home from yet another doctor's appointment with still no solid answers when I walked partway up our stairs to sit and be by myself. I was feeling more than discouraged ... it was an all time low. My two-year-old daughter (seeming to know that something was not right) followed me up the stairs with several books in her hands. As she plopped herself down next to me, she briefly laid her head on my arm, glanced at me and said rather quietly "I read to you Mommy" ... and then did exactly that. It was the best medicine for my heavy heart.
-- Barbara Kanoun

The other night, as I was rubbing my 5-year old daughter's back at bedtime, she rolled over, gave me a great big kiss and then looked right into my eyes and said in her sweet little voice, "mama, you are my bestest friend ever and I am going to live with you FOREVER". I cried! And she asked if those were 'happy tears' and I nodded that indeed, they were.
-- Charlynne Murphy

For almost two decades, Family and Home Network has been encouraging mothers to write about and share their experiences in our monthly journal Welcome Home. Whatever way you celebrate Mother's Day at your house, know that we appreciate your contributions to your family, your community and to our greater world.

Family and Home Network publishes the monthly journal Welcome Home for parents who have made the choice – or want to make the choice – to spend generous amounts of time with their children, from birth through the teen years. In Welcome Home readers find real families who are making real time for their children – and finding real joy. Providing a refuge from our culture’s pervasive messages of consumerism, Welcome Home is advertisement-free and provides:

• insightful personal stories, both serious and humorous, written by parents who share their experiences, thoughts, and feelings in a spirit of community and camaraderie;
  
• empowering information for and about real families, including resource reviews, health information, and affordability studies profiling families across a range of incomes;
  
• reports on the work of researchers and other professionals regarding the power and importance of parent time for children from infancy through the teen years;
  
• analyses of economic proposals and public policies regarding the care of children, and opportunities to participate in cultural and media critiques.
  

Family and Home Network works to ensure that support for families does not discriminate based on child care choices. Parents must have access to reliable information about their children’s needs, and support must be extended to families who want to increase the amount of time their children spend in nurturing parental care.

Family and Home Network Our Vision: Universal recognition of the critical importance of parents' emotional engagement with their children; societal support for the need of parents and children to spend generous amounts of time together; profound respect for parents who make these commitments and acknowledgement of the short- and long-term benefits to society. Our Mission: Advocate for parents and children of all ages concerning their need for generous amounts of time together; Affirm the choice to be home through the many stages of parenthood to nurture children of all ages; Provide parent-to-parent support, education and networking; Correct society's misconceptions and refute stereotypes about parenting; Encourage respect for the contributions made by each parent, as couples share decisions regarding nurturing and providing for their families; Empower all parents to preserve and improve the opportunity to forgo or cut back on paid employment; and Educate society about the benefits of parents and children being emotionally engaged and spending generous amounts of time together.