My husband and I need to supplement his income. I am considering doing day care in my home so I can continue to be at home full-time with my fourteen-month-old. I don't know if this would be a positive experience, or if I should return to work part-time. What are other readers' experiences who do day care at home? 

Mary Beth C.
New Castle, Virginia

I've been a home day care provider for three years. I've tried many other "home businesses" from vending machines to sewing. I worked part-time outside of the home, but although it was nice to get out of the house for a while, I missed my daughter and resented paying someone else to care for her. 

I found day care was the most profitable and worked best with my young children. I preferred taking part-time kids so I could still have some time alone with my own kids. Once word gets out about your day care business you will have no shortage of parents requesting your services. Start out slow. Add one child at a time until you and the child get into a routine. 

Day care worked well for us when my children were younger. Now that they are all in school, I still do before- and after-school care. I wish you success.

Laura P.
South Jordan, Utah

I have done lots of part-time babysitting, and I would highly recommend it. I always try to watch children close to the same age as mine or older. I don't watch infants because it would take too much attention away from my own children. That would defeat the purpose of being an at-home mom. 

Day care is a hard adjustment at first. Give it at least two weeks to see how things go. It gets much easier once the children know you better and you establish a routine. Find a family you work well with.

Laura
Westminster, California

Day care in the home can make it possible to earn money while still meeting your child's needs, but a child who is fourteen months old still has a great many needs and may not do well with other children sharing his mommy, his home, and his things for many hours day after day. 

What I decided to do was to provide part-time child care. I have watched a set of three-year-old twins after nursery school for a few days per week, but the majority of my work has been in providing after-school care for one to three elementary school-aged children. Although my after-school hours are intense, it is for a relatively short period of time. I have found that the hourly rates for after-school care are much more per hour than one can charge for full-time care. I make more money watching three children after school than I would watching one child full-time. 

Many of my friends have tried this kind of part-time arrangement, and they found it too difficult to deal with homework, after-school activities, and dinner preparations. Although my children have not been thrilled being with my after-school children every day, for the most part, it has solved a problem of bringing in an income, working fewer hours a day, and still being available for my children.

Roseann B.
Port Chester, New York

I watch two boys in the afternoons to supplement our income while I stay home with my four-and-a-half-year-old and twenty-month-old. This job has its pros and cons. I would say the greatest advantage to watching other children has been being with my children while making a small contribution to our finances. Also, as time has gone on, my children and my "other" children have become close friends, playmates, and allies. They seem more like brothers and sisters than children from separate families. They share good times, fight with typical sibling rivalry, and love each other. 

However, from my standpoint there have also been disadvantages to this scenario. Because I started watching one child when he was only an infant, and my own child was only six months old, I feel I missed out on a lot of important one-on-one time with my daughter. The stress of having two infants was high, and there were many times when I questioned my choice. Once I started watching the second child, the dynamics changed, and having three became a constant battle of someone always being left out. Three toddlers at once was high stress. When I had my second child, I felt even more guilt about not giving my baby full-time attention. 

Remember, the more children you watch, the more you will be limited as to how much you can get out of the house. I find I must complete all my errands and most of my chores in the mornings before the boys come. By the time they leave, I just want to relax and have dinner and quiet time with my family. 

Difficult times may arise when dealing with the parents. I recommend a written contract if you intend to watch someone else's child. Specify how much and how often you will be paid, when you want time off, and how much notice you will give, how much notice you need if they will take time off, or leave, and any specific rules. For example, determine who supplies diapers and food ahead of time. What about late pickups? These can all become points of contention if you do not have them ironed out from the beginning. Other discord can arise from differing parenting techniques. Consider additional expenses involved: food, baby wipes, diapers, crayons, etc. Do you have toys appropriate for the age of the children you watch if they are not the same age as your own child? Also consider any additional equipment you may need: high chairs, booster seats, car seats, strollers. 

Providing childcare is not for everyone, and there are many things to consider before making the decision. Good luck!

Rebecca W.
Manassas, Virginia

My husband and I chose for me to provide childcare after the birth of our second son in 1992. Our elder son was five at the time. You REALLY need to love little children to do this job. You need to treat these children as if they were yours, even though in the beginning you may be working without the automatic love you feel for your own child. That can be difficult, but it is necessary for good day care. 

There are lots of challenges in caring for other children in your home: your own kids can be the worst behaved ones because they are in their own home. I found I needed to cultivate a calm approach so that I could discipline my own children appropriately, and deal with other children patiently, too. This did not always happen, especially in the early years. For myself, I found I needed to be disciplined about getting enough rest, eating right, and exercising. I recommend cultivating a network of friends for support, because there will be days when you will need to be reminded of why you took this job. 

The job has its benefits: being able to be home with your own children, socialization for everyone involved, learning to deal with different personalities and group dynamics, providing quality care for someone else who must work and yet values their own children, too. And, perhaps, a happier husband because he can relax about the financial situation. 

High-quality care for children, yours or anyone else's, obviously requires you to give a lot of yourself. So be prepared to find a balance between family life and work life. Reserve some time and energy at the end of your shift to read a book with your kids on the couch. Sometimes I find it helpful to go for a bike ride, or push a stroller on a quick walk around the neighborhood to help me change gears. The stresses associated with both motherhood and caregiving are real, and the more you know about yourself and what works for you going into it, the more successful you can be. 

I love being home with my children and have grown to love my job as caregiver to other children. I tell parents that I emphasize the HOME part of home day care. We do not follow a "curriculum" -- this is not school. We follow the rhythms of family life, so cooking, cleaning, playing, and learning are pretty much part of our gentler routine. 

Sharon K.
Mitchellville, Maryland

I have two children aged ten and eight. I have provided day care in my home off and on since my first was six months old. I have found child care very difficult. 

Ask yourself these questions. Do you honestly enjoy other people's children? Do you like to play? How important is a clean house? Do you have space in your home for extra children? Will you need it to be quiet while your baby sleeps? 

I strongly advise starting out slowly, with one or two part-time children. Perhaps try after-school care for five- and six-year-olds who are more self-sufficient at playing, or one child who is the same age as your child.

Tina E.
West Linn, Oregon

As a seven-year day care veteran, my sincere advice would be to work opposite shifts of your husband, or have him take a second job. I've raised a total of sixteen extra children 20 to 60 hours each week, all of whom I have loved as my own. However, I firmly believe that children should spend 99% of their waking hours with their own parents, not a decent babysitter. Negative features have included parents picking up kids three hours late, bouncing checks to pay me, toddlers insisting I'm mama, huge training or discipline differences, bad socialization, and my own two birth children feeling cheated out of a true mom. I even postponed increasing my own family size because of burnout. After food and expenses, my net income hovers at zero. If I had it to do over again, I'd live in a rented mobile home without a vehicle before I'd consider day care.

Beth S.
Camp Douglas, Wisconsin

My suggestion is to look for some other options to supplement your husband's income. I have been a substitute caregiver at several area day care centers and nursery schools. More recently, I've subbed for some after-school care programs in my area. With substituting, you have the flexibility of working or not working. My son comes with me and has the benefit of being with other children. Subs usually do not get any benefits, but some places might make continuing education courses available to you free or at a discount. I have had employers pay for workshops, seminars, parenting classes, CPR, and first aid courses. 

Another option could be an early morning newspaper route. My route requires about an hour of work on weekdays and Saturday mornings, and then more time to collate Sunday papers. There is additional time required for paperwork. I wish you luck with whatever you choose -- you've already made the most important choice -- being with your child.

Pat H.
Vienna, New Jersey